Shalom, Christmas

Music is such an important part of our family's life. My parents met each other dancing, and they danced their entire lives together. My father-in-law is a Cantor, and my husband, daughter, and son are all musicians. We are surrounded by music.

So, sometime in early November, when my children start asking when the radio station is going to be all-Christmas, I bristle. I tell them that if it starts before Thanksgiving, I just can't listen to it. Christmas music should be special. For me, it brings back all kinds of December memories, so I'd prefer that it not start in mid-November. When I hear The Little Drummer Boy, I think about the living nativity. When we sing O Come All Ye Faithful, it reminds me that my Dad wouldn't let us put the baby Jesus in the manger until late on Christmas Eve. We Three Kings is a reminder that the Three Wise Men shouldn't be placed around the nativity until January 6th - the feast of the Epiphany. Rudolph and I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus bring back memories of singing along with Mitch Miller. I try to make all of these connections for my children, at least letting them in on the memories, even if the religious ones don't resonate with them.

Singing Stille Nacht

Our family has built a musical Christmas tradition that feels familiar to all of us. It is a week away. I am deep into the prep at this point, and as much as I may whine about it, I enjoy it. I turn on a sappy Hallmark channel movie or sing along to Christmas carols, as I clean the house from top to bottom. We host an annual holiday party with a typical crowd of about 100 (and invite 200). It’s a real mix of Christians and Jews. Everyone comes together, in our interfaith home, to celebrate the season. Our house is decorated with snowmen, carolers, ornament trees, and menorahs. It is comfortable for everyone, and it brings them joy. My Jewish husband plays the piano, and our family and friends join us to sing Christmas carols and a few Chanukah songs. 

Lots of Little Ones - All Grown Up Now

Many of my brothers, sisters-in-law, nieces, nephews, spouses, and children come. When my parents joined us, they danced during their favorite songs. The year Mom passed away, it was bittersweet when we sang, Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer. Another year, my very dear friend stepped up to the piano to belt out Santa Baby" with me. Did you know that there are lots of Jews who love to sing Christmas carols? One of my vivid memories from this day is of my Jewish sister-in-law and my father-in-law, the Cantor, singing Stille Nacht (Silent Night) at the piano.  There are a few people who have made it every year - for 24 years. Many have come for at least 20! Each year, there is someone who joins us for the first time. Our friends' children have grown up coming to our party. This year, a little girl who wore her velvet Christmas dress at age 4, will bring her boyfriend at age 19. Now, our children invite their high school and college friends to join us. When, in November, people start asking "When is your party," you know you've created a tradition.

Getting Ready Many Years Ago

Our children enjoy preparing for the big day, and they look forward to inviting new friends. My daughter even postponed her Birthright Israel trip, because it would overlap our holiday party. One boy, after coming for the past 8 or so years, visited a few days after the party to make gingerbread houses. He was surprised that we were playing Christmas music. "I thought you were Jewish," he said. "We are, but haven't you been coming to our holiday party for years?" He responded, "Yes, but I thought you just did that for the Christians!"

You know what? I think we're doing it right.