Twice Means Tradition

When my parents were growing up, they were part of the melting pot generation. Their parents believed in being American - not Italian, not German. That may be the reason that we didn't have a lot of family tradition. It could also be the fact that there were so many of us! 

For our first Christmas, my husband surprised me with a fully-decorated Christmas tree. Since I was a bird watcher, he found enough bird ornaments to cover the entire tree. It was one of those special moments. Then, once our daughter was born, it seems like she said the phrase, "We always do it that way," from the moment she could talk. Tradition has always been important to her. When she was about 2 1/2, she laid under our Christmas tree and basked in the glow of the lights. Yes, it was a beautiful moment --- one that gave me pause. 

We were beginning to build our own family traditions. I knew that what we did at age 2 1/2 was going to be the beginning of traditions that would last a lifetime. If you know me, you know that I tend to do things all the way or not at all. So, if I was going to have Jewish children, I was going to have Jewish children - not half-Jewish. That year I made the decision that it would be the last year to have a Christmas tree.

However, I can't lie to you. As I walk through my neighborhood at this time of year, I do have Christmas decorating envy. I so enjoy walking about the neighborhood to see the lights. The trees peeking out through the windows of my neighbors' homes delight me. We did have lights for a couple of years. About a year after we moved into our home, my husband decided that he was going to have lights. He made the columns on our front porch look like candy canes. The lights could have landed a plane! If you give a Jew some lights at Christmas...he'll go overboard! Although that was probably the last time we had lights, our wonderful next-door-neighbors had loads of beautiful white lights across the front of their house. Because of the way our houses are placed, their lights always wandered close to our trees. I always hoped that they'd find their way on to our trees. They never did! When our daughter was about 3 years old, and our son was a newborn, we spent most nights driving around town looking for lights. Now, every time I see Christmas lights, I think of my daughter's tiny voice, "Yights, Mommy, more yights!"

Our decorations at this time of year include menorahs, snowmen, stockings, and two ornament trees. My kids enjoy the decorating more than I do; it's the tradition I enjoy.

I suppose I've overcompensated for the lack of Christmas decorations by buying menorahs (we're up to 10), special candles, and even an oil menorah. The glow of the candles each night warms my heart.

Decorating is a major part of this holiday season. As an interfaith family, we built our own traditions and figured out what works for us.